Happiness, You were so Close...

But Happiness was just a thought away...

          As I sit in a dark apartment with only the sounds of the crickets, my dog breathing and the thoughts in my head.  Wishing sleep would come and take me away once more, the only place I can seem to escape all these feelings running through me.

But Happiness was just a mile away...

          Loneliness fills my mind, heart, and soul as all my loved ones are miles away.  What used to be just an hour max now doubles in time distance and space.

But Happiness was just a mindset away...

          Hard to think positively when your mind is lost in what seems like an endless stream of sadness and negativity.

But Happiness, I was almost there... 

          You seemed so close, seemed like a choice I just had to make.  But why can't I?  Is it because I can't move on? Stuck in past with the things I knew made me smile and laugh.  Being held daily by the one I cared about so much, seeing my family whenever I wanted, laughing my face off and reminiscing with old friends and sharing unforgettable experiences with my old housemates. 
You left me alone in this foreign place, and now I can't find you.  I wish I had a map with directions that could lead me back to you, back to the feeling I once was so in love with.